Relationship building key to China

Question:

How important is it to establish a personal relationship with a colleague or client before getting to business?

Local Perspective:

Usually the relationship is first established in a formal meeting. If there is an opportunity to do that, I think it is a good idea. I would do this by sending a card or a brief letter of introduction—something in writing, and your message can be translated if language is a problem. I would do this with the key contact/colleague only. Depending on the nature of the work, if the Canadian representative is to work with the leaders, he/she should maintain their personal level with the leaders. The class (position) difference can be very distinct. Leaders socialize with the leaders, and staff with staff. Once in the field, and the social network is established, the socialization usually takes in the form of eating out in restaurants or local trips for sight seeing or shopping. Meals in restaurants (rather than home cooked meals) are common among the Chinese when they meet with their guests. The reasons are that they have very small living quarters, their homes are usually open to close friends and family members, and restaurants are considered as a treat for their guests. Chinese love Karioke, it is a main form of their entertainment. If you love to sing, you will have a good time. If not, just tell them that you have a lot of project work to do, and you could not join them. There will also be a lot of banquets where you both check each other out, and do a lot of politicking. Learn the mealtime manners. Your local host will always serve you and put food in your bowl. When you feel comfortable enough, you may do the same, but not right away. They will invite you to drink (stronger spirits) almost every other bite of food! It is their custom, and they do this when they are happy. Leaders (males or females) are expected to be able to drink. Drinking somehow is perceived to be associated with the strength of leadership in China! If you cannot drink, ask for non-alcoholic drink, and learn how to toast and make all kinds of good wishes to praise the organization, the project, the staff, and the leaders. The Chinese will/may insist that you drink the alcohol (their gesture of hospitality), I found that among all the excuses I tried to use, the one that works best is when I told them that "my health cannot tolerate alcohol".

Canadian Perspective:

Personal relationships in China are extremely important. But it’s also important to note that personal relationships take time to cultivate. One of the first rules of any personal relationship from the outset is the mutual interest of both parties. Gift-giving (songli) is an important practice in China. A gift may consist of small, inexpensive gestures for colleagues (such as music or mementoes from Canada for example) to elaborate dinners and banquets (what would probably be called a "business" lunch or dinner in Canada, but usually much more lavish). Sometimes small requests for favours may arise during a relationship. Which means that "negotiation" also sometimes entails negotiating personal relationships as well.